Lose the Name of Action
by seirios aster
Summary: At Tonks's funeral, Harry is left to his own thoughts on the aftermath of the war.


Harry had no idea when all of this would end. The war was over, but there was so much to rebuild. There were so many funerals, but maybe this one was just harder on him than the others. It was for Remus _and_ Tonks, after all.

Harry had been surprised by some of the people who attended. He had expected Andromeda, clearly. Tonks was her daughter. Harry was also pretty sure the older man and woman a little farther away were Remus's parents, although he had had no idea they were still alive. The man standing next to them was probably Remus's brother, but Harry hadn't expected Narcissa Malfoy.

Yes, Harry did know that she was Tonks's aunt, but he had been fairly certain that she was also one of the people who had disowned Tonks's mum. Harry was just glad that Mrs. Malfoy hadn't dragged Draco along. Harry wouldn't have stood for that.

When the service ended, people slowly started to scatter. Andromeda stayed rooted in her spot, looking shell-shocked as she stared at the coffins with Teddy in her arms. Mrs. Malfoy went over to talk to her and seemed—contrary to popular belief—actually comforting. The Lupins were farther off, but Harry didn't really blame them. Mrs. Lupin was in hysterics.

"It's terrible, isn't it? Watching so much pain and being unable to do anything?"

Harry started at the voice. There was a man standing next to him. Harry didn't particularly recognize him, but he did seem a little familiar. Maybe someone in the Order or one of Tonks's friends? "This is the fifth funeral I've been to this week. I think I'm starting to become jaded," Harry mentioned, wondering why he was bothering to reply.

"The last time I went through this, I thought so, too," the stranger admitted with a slight smile. "But that's not it. It's self-defense. On one level, we just can't believe it. You don't think they're gone yet, or you can't process it. Then comes the anger. Grief. Acceptance." He sighed. "I didn't think Lupin would go. As embarrassed as I am to admit it, I used to liken him to a cockroach. Survive nuclear winter, he could. He survived near enough." After an awkward pause, the man asked, "You know who got him?"

Harry wondered who the hell he was talking to. The man certainly sounded like an Auror, but what manner of Auror wouldn't know what happened? "Doholov."

"Antonin? Christ, Bellatrix must have killed Nymphadora first. Antonin always was one to take cheap shots," the man muttered angrily. With a sigh, he said, "Or Lupin tried to save Nymphadora. Either way. They shouldn't be dead."

"Did you work with Tonks?" Harry asked, trying to figure out who in their right mind would dare call Tonks Nymphadora and face her wrath.

A sad smile. "No. Used to baby-sit her, but I went to school with Lupin," the man admitted. "I never have figured out how no one noticed his 'furry little problem,' as your father and the others liked to put it," he reminisced. "Lupin was one of the few Gryffindors you could trust to be fair. Your father was mostly fair, but Quidditch always was like a religion for him. God forbid a Ravenclaw blaspheme. Your mum was one of the nicest people I ever knew. I've no idea how she ended up with your dad sometimes. He was still a bit of a prat back in seventh year. Well, their seventh year. Your mum was brilliant."

Harry wasn't sure he wanted to keep listening. Oh, if this was another one of those well-wishers, he could scream. "I'm sure," Harry said, starting to tune out the man. Merlin, Andromeda really was losing it. Mrs. Malfoy even looked upset about that.

"You're a lot like her, Lily. No patience for fools," the stranger mentioned, also looking at the two women. "'Course, you're as brave as her to face Voldemort like you did. Your mother actually made him bleed once. Gobsmacked everyone."

"You said Voldemort's name," Harry realized. "Not many people do anymore becaus—"

"Because of the Taboo, yes. It doesn't cross international boundaries, as much at Voldemort would have liked it to, so I never stopped speaking his name," the man explained darkly. He was still watching Andromeda have a nervous breakdown. Mrs. Malfoy was holding Teddy now. "I hope he and Bellatrix are burning in hell."

"Doesn't everyone?" Harry asked, deciding the non-Auror was okay. He might have actually been friends with Harry's mum and not just one of the well-wishers. Plus, it was rare that anyone compared Harry to his mum except in comparison to his eyes. The mention of faults was refreshing, too. "How'd you know my mum?"

"I helped her end a fight between your dad and Severus once, and your mum came up with this great idea, which was actually terrible. She wouldn't stop apologizing for a week," the man replied. "Severus wouldn't talk to me for a fortnight, but your dad thought it was hilarious."

Why was Harry not surprised that this man was friends with Snape? "You were friends with Professor Snape?" Harry prompted. "You know what he did, right?"

The man chuckled and mentioned, "You can't pull that on me, Harry. You and I both know the only way Dumbledore would let himself be killed like that was if it was on purpose. However, yes, Severus was a good friend." He was silent for a moment before he asked, "Do you read Shakespeare?"

"Er, what I had to for school," Harry replied, completely confused by the non sequitur.

The older man grinned like a cat and explained, "There were two passages I always remembered. The lament is far too relevant for now, but I mean that I lost the name of action. It shouldn't have ended like this."

The man had turned far more serious and murmured, "I shouldn't have let it end like this. I could have stopped it. I deserve so much anger from you. In a way, I've done worse to you than Voldemort. It's my fault you had to fight him, that your parents are dead, that Dumbledore's dead, that Sirius…" He broke off and looked away before he admitted, "I knew about Pettigrew. I thought he was loyal to the Order. I thought they knew, but they didn't."

Harry was going to get the full story out of this man, clearly, but he had to correct him: "A piece of Voldemort's soul was lodged in my forehead. I don't think that could have been fixed easily."

The other man laughed sharply and corrected Harry in turn, "A strong enough exorcist would have done, but two incorporeal bits of Voldemort wandering around would have been a bit unpleasant. Granted, any necromancer could have sent it past the ninth gate in the blink of an eye." He turned silent again and then sighed. "I should have done."

Harry started. Okay, his dark wizard alert so had not gone off. "You—"

The other man blinked. "Oh, God, no. I knew one," he said. "No, what I meant was… Well, I suppose you found all the horcruxes."

Harry stared. Harry stared harder. Harry realized he was a complete idiot. More of one than usual. Granted, Harry hadn't thought—And why he was at Tonks's funeral made sense. "Merlin's socks, you might have said something earlier," Harry mentioned.

Regulus Black looked down at the ground in shame. He murmured, "I'm a coward. What did you expect?"

Not the man standing in front of him, that was for sure. Harry really could have hit himself for not noticing the man's resemblance to Sirius. "I don't know what I expected," Harry said, dodging the question. He was so glad Ron and Hermione were a ways off, with the rest of the Weasleys. Harry hadn't been able to take the constant pressure anymore. It was easier to be one of the masses than help the others with their pain.

"A coward? A traitor? That's what most people call me here," Black said.

"Well, Sirius called you an idiot," Harry said, wondering what in his right mind he said that for. Congratulations, Potter, for sticking your foot in it again.

Black smiled at that and said, "Oh, brotherly love. I had forgotten what that was like." At the look on Harry's face, Black asked, "I take it he also said I was too weak to stand up to Mum? I wouldn't be surprised if he did."

"Well…"

"You don't have to say anything. I didn't expect anything more from him. We parted after a misunderstanding. I've never been good with words, but I guess I'm glad it turned out like that, too. One less thing for him to have worried about in Azkaban," Black murmured. He sighed and looked at his watch. "I should leave. I've been here long enough."

"You're not even going to talk to Tonks's mum? Or Mrs. Malfoy?" Harry demanded.

"Neither of them would want to see me, Harry. I'm a traitor, remember?" he reminded him. "I've struck out on both counts." After a thought, he pleaded, "Please don't tell them I was here." Harry was about to argue, but Black apparated away.

A half an hour later, as Harry was about to leave with the Weasleys, he noticed a slightly more upset and disheveled-looking Regulus Black walk up to Narcissa Malfoy and start speaking to her. She slapped him. Then she started crying onto his shoulder. He seemed to only be able to watch her in surprise. When Andromeda, holding Teddy again, noticed the scene, she said, "You sure took bloody long enough."

Harry left.


End file.
